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This just tells you how hard it is to be single nowadays ...
This was on the Tonight Show with Jay Leno. Jay went into the audience to
find the most embarrassing first date that a woman ever had.
The winner described her worst first date experience. There was absolutely
no question as to why her tale took the prize!
Marilyn said it was midwinter - snowing
and quite cold - and the guy had taken her skiing to Lake Arrowhead. It
was a day trip (no overnight). No, not Marilyn. They were strangers, after
all, and truly had never met before. The outing was fun but relatively
uneventful until they were headed home late that afternoon. They were
driving back down the mountain when she gradually began to realize that
she should NOT have had that extra latte. They were about an hour away
from anywhere with a restroom and in the middle of nowhere!
Her companion suggested she try to
hold it, which she did for awhile. Unfortunately, because of the heavy
snow and slow going, there came a point where she told him that he had
better stop and let her pee beside the road, or it would be the front seat
of his car. They stopped and she quickly crawled out beside the car,
yanked her pants down and started.
Unfortunately, in the deep snow she didn't have good footing, so she let her
butt rest against the rear fender to steady herself. Her
indeed was a real gentleman and refrained from peeking. All she could think
about was the relief she felt despite the rather
embarrassing nature of situation.
Upon
finishing, however, she soon became aware of another sensation. As she
bent to pull up her pants, the young lady discovered her buttocks were
firmly glued against the car's fender. Thoughts of tongues frozen to pump
handles immediately came to mind as she attempted to disengage her flesh
from the icy metal. It was quickly apparent that she had a brand new
problem due to the extreme cold. Horrified by her plight and yet aware of
the humour, she answered her date's concerns about "what was taking so
long" with a reply that indeed, she was "freezing her butt off and needed
some assistance"!
He came around the car as she tried
to cover herself with her sweater and then, as she looked imploringly into
his eyes, he burst out laughing. She too, got the giggles and when they
finally managed to compose themselves, they assessed her dilemma.
Obviously, as hysterical as the situation was, they also were faced with a
real problem. Both agreed it would take something hot to free her chilly
cheeks from the grip of the icy metal! Thinking about what had gotten her
into the predicament in the first place, both quickly realized that there
was only one way to get her free so, as she looked the other way, her
first time date proceeded to unzip his pants and pee her butt off the
fender. As for the Tonight Show - she took the prize hands down - or
perhaps that should be "pants down". And you thought your first date was
embarrassing - this one redefined the term "pissed off"!!!
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